My first job was as a cashier at a local pharmacy owned by a man that went to the same church as my family. I worked there right up until the time I left home for Ball State University. In total, I was employed there for almost two years. There were two pharmacists that worked somewhat of a rotating schedule. There was one pharmacist that I worked with more often, and the truth is that I enjoyed working with him more. We would talk non-stop about the important things in life; you know…The Indiana Pacers and The Chicago Cubs. He would also impose his opinion that Larry Bird was the greatest basketball player of all-time because he had more points and rebounds than Magic Johnson and more rebounds and assists than Michael Jordan. We had endless sports trivia contests and every once in a while we talked about…MARRIAGE. Seem out of place? I thought so too. When I say we “talked” about marriage, what I actually mean is that this Pharmacist repeatedly made the following comment. “Nik,” he would say; “Don’t ever get married.” This, along with several jokes about how having a wife costs too much money, was common place for nearly two years.
What I learned about this man over time is that he had been married three times, each ending in a painful divorce. He regretted ever getting married, and each and every comment was an example of how this man in his late 60s had lost hope in marriage. “Nik,” he would say; “Don’t ever get married.”
It seems like there is a growing number of people who are beginning to express this same type of sentiment towards marriage. Marriage is at the center of many national debates. While these debates are raging there is a growing number of married and single people watching the debates play out. In addition they are seeing everything from adultery to people simply falling in and out of love and even domestic violence. Some are experiencing these things right now in their marriages, while others are watching it happen. Slowly, we are losing hope in the concept/institution of marriage. If you feel this way, whether you are currently married, divorced, or single, I want to provide some insight that might allow you to realign your beliefs about marriage with the originally intended design.